You went shopping and gravitated to a really pretty black top. You did what the average fashionista would do. You bought it. Yep, yet another (but new) black addition to the already abundant and redundant collection of your other really great black tops.
Shoes are arguably a different story, because there is a variety of color, style, and heels to consider. These purchases can be more easily justified. Ditto to dresses, but how many pairs of jeans do you really need? Skinnys, flared, and boot legged; black, blue, and colored, I get it. But when is your ‘enough’?
Let’s be clear, this is not gender-specific. Men love to shop too. I’ve witnessed many men’s closets with abundant collections of ties, belts, dress shirts, golf shirts, belts, sport caps, and sneakers. Seriously.
The caveat: This behavior does not suggest you are a compulsive shopper.
Compulsive buying disorder (CBD) is “characterized by an obsession with shopping and buying behavior that causes adverse consequences. According to Kellett and Bolton , compulsive buying “is experienced as an irresistible–uncontrollable urge, resulting in excessive, expensive and time-consuming retail activity [that is] typically prompted by negative affectivity” and results in “gross social, personal and/or financial difficulties”. CBD is frequently comorbid with mood, anxiety, substance abuse, eating disorders, OCD, and mania.
There are many people who love to shop and acquire that do not suffer from this addiction because they have the ability to set limits or they can afford the impulse. It could also be more about a realistic mindfulness of finances and/or physical space.
Whether it be small to large acquisitions or gender-specific, we all have our moments when we succumb to our individual weaknesses. These unique indulgences are hard to defy and can span from big boy toys like cars and large electronics, to even smaller new and shiny toys for our irresistable children. Embellishing our homes with new decor are purchases that may be an ongoing process too. Chotkes may fill our hearts with joy but they can ultimately fill and overwhelm the home, if there’s little or no regard for ‘enough.’
Yet even with the parameters in mind (affordability and space), there is still a danger in over-acquiring. Just because you can afford to, doesn’t mean you need to have it. So when does it become too much for you?
Could it be when…
- You’ve realized you don’t wear 80% of your wardrobe? (You tend to wear the newest items when you want to look your best)
- Your closets are noticeably getting more crowded?
- Can’t find what you’re looking for anymore?
- Too many options and too many choices have complicated decision-making (you’ve noticed you have a lot of the ‘same’) How many black tank tops are too many and how many do you actually wear?
- You’ve noticed you have an increasing number of junk drawers?
- Every horizontal surface in your home has too many frames or chotkes on them?
- The kitchen gadget drawer is out of control (and you don’t even use most of them)
- Keeping up with the ‘latest’ technology is costing you money and space (let go of old and ‘dated’ smart phones, TV’s, computers, and printers)
- Your collection of sunglasses needs its own terminal.
- The garage has more bicycles and cars than people living in the house.
- These are just some of the red flags that might alert you that ‘enough’ is indeed enough. Do any of these resonate with you? When and what are your ‘enoughs’?