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The Waning Shelf Life of of Boomer Memorabelia

levi jeans_opt-2It’s hard to believe that my baby boomer generation is getting on in years.  Our ages range between 51 and 70 by now. We’ve celebrated so many decades of milestones along the way, including the births of our millennial children. That all adds up to one heck of a lot of memorabilia.

Most boomers save stuff, it’s part of our culture. We’ve not only held onto our own personal mementos, we’ve saved and stored all of our children’s stuff as well.

For certain, they are not lost or forgotten.  Through the years, we may have stumbled upon an old treasure that rekindled a memory or two, or intentionally went digging to find the wedding album or that elementary school class picture. And yes, we’ve probably shared some epic childhood stories and old classic photographs with our children.  At least once or twice, lol.

We wanted them to know who we were.  At least for me, it was important and a very intimate way to share my past. It was storytelling at its best, and we probably told the story on repeat for most of their young lives.  But those memory boxes were soon to be overtaken by a whole new generation of memories. Their own.

To no surprise, I saved it all; their artwork, projects, camp letters, school work from 1st grade through college, and photos galore. When we sold our home, we were faced with the daunting pull of the purge. (excerpt from my Diary of a Move-documented in 2010) Although we edited, condensed, and down-sized, our basement was still filled with an impressive stack of memory boxes.  Baby boomers and millenniums sharing space side by side. It never occurred to me that they were to be roommates for over 30 years.

But with both of our children recently married, it was time for them to claim their stuff and begin their new lives. Another downsize and yet another purge.

I asked them each to come home and go through their boxes.  As it’s been said of millennials, they have way fewer struggles with letting things go than boomers do. I witnessed this to be so true.  They were rapidly tossing pictures (if they themselves were not in them), and trashing old school papers and projects with no remorse. They took pics of pics on their iPhones if it wasn’t already in a sustainable photo album.

When they uncovered their sentimental sweet spot (and it was different for each of them) they hesitated and packed those memories thoughtfully into a “keep” box.  It was their personal decision to savor anything from baby shoes to autographed sports memorabilia, yearbooks, or a handwritten note. The interesting rethink was that now as adults, they too wanted to pass a legacy on to their future children one day. Just like me, they understood it would be important to share who they were as children and adolescents.  As for themselves personally, they will have so many more opportunities within the next 30 years to revisit and enjoy these saved childhood memories once again.  Down the road, it will be a special day when they rediscover these gems.

But here comes the clincher.  I realized at that moment that I did not have the same 30 + years ahead to justify keeping all this nostalgia.  I’ve since moved twice, so I revisited and touched the stuff many times now.  I have reminisced over four decades and have well enjoyed their stay. Perhaps bittersweet but the honest assessment is that my personal memorabilia (excluding photos) has a limited lifespan. Its value is waning even for me. More importantly, my children don’t want my old memories, they have their own. So it begs the question,  why and for whom am I saving this for?

Funny as we age and evolve, what was once considered sentimental, now just feels like clutter. If it doesn’t tug at my heartstrings, I’m OK with letting it go.  After all, they’re just things, not people.

So as my children continued weeding and filling trash bags, I too was compelled to reduce down my memory boxes and shed once more. Amongst my report cards, transcripts, diplomas, and trophies, I was ready to toss my autograph book from 5th grade, our honeymoon airline ticket, and hotel key.

Ahh, but definitely not tossing my patched-up Levi jeans.  Not today. 45 years later and they still fit me like the day I bought them. Sparking joy? Hell yea. Big time 🙂

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On Moving & Downsizing; Guest Expert Moreen Torpy

Family MovingI’m so excited to welcome Moreen Torpy today to talk about the essential tips to consider prior to moving, and some simple steps that can help reduce the overwhelming process. Moreen is the De-Clutter Coach, a trained Professional Organizer, Author, and Speaker and expert in Moving and Downsizing. For more info visit her website here, http://www.decluttercoach.ca.

Thanks Moreen for sharing your expertise with all my readers!

 

Moving Takes Planning and Preparation

When we think about moving, the first thing that comes to mind is the packing. Of course, there are plenty of other considerations as well. Here’s a handy list of 9 things to remember to cover as many areas as possible.

1. Allow plenty of time to move. If you can possibly allow eight weeks, you will be able to accomplish everything you need to do.

2. When will your new place be available? If you’re purchasing a home or condo, you can plan for the closing date. However if you’re moving into a care facility, you may have only a couple of days in which to get there or lose the placement.

3. Can you obtain the floor plan for your new place? Using this, plan furniture placement before moving so that the heavy pieces can be placed by the movers. This will eliminate your trying to lift heavy pieces and risk injury to yourself.

4. Book the mover or recruit a team and van. At one point in life, we can’t do all the lifting and carrying ourselves. Get estimates from three companies and ensure they provide this in writing, addressing the same questions, so you can compare and select the one best suited to your situation. Also ensure the company you hire has insurance for any damage that may occur during the move caused by the movers. Get this in writing to protect yourself.

5. Purge anything you can before moving. This is your opportunity to pass along family heirlooms, downsize your wardrobe, sell furniture or household items that won’t be moving with you. Remember that movers charge by time, weight and distance. For a local move, the Time consideration is crucial. The longer it takes to load and unload anything you don’t need will increase your cost.

6. Assemble packing materials—boxes, paper, bubble wrap etc. If such a service exists in your area, rent moving boxes. These are plastic flip-top bins that are delivered to your home a few days before your moving date and picked up at the other end a few days later. Typically you pay for the number of days you have the bins in your possession. If you use cardboard boxes, either scrounge them from stores or purchase them. Stores have less incentive to give the boxes away these days as they can recoup some of their costs by selling them to recyclers. As for packing paper, use unprinted newsprint so the printing ink won’t get on your hands and precious possessions. This paper can be purchased from some moving companies and local newspaper offices (end rolls). The latter is much cheaper if you have access to it. Bubble wrap is great for delicate breakables. It’s available from moving companies and some stationery stores.

7. Use plenty of paper and bubble wrap to ensure nothing is broken. After packing only the most important of your possessions, you won’t want anything to arrive at destination in pieces. Wrap each item well and stuff the spaces between the items with extra paper to ensure nothing moves in the box.

8. Label boxes with large numbers and the room they are to go into. For safety reasons never write the box contents on the outside. Keep that information in a Moving Log where you list all the box numbers and their contents. At destination, when you need a particular item, check your list for its location and go directly to that box. With the room names on the boxes, they can be placed in the appropriate rooms and save you having to sort them yourself.

9. Unpack, recycle boxes and paper—give away or blue box. Start unpacking the boxes in the rooms you need to set up first—kitchen, bedrooms and bathroom(s). Then work your way through the rest as you prioritize.

Moving doesn’t need to be the worst experience of your life. With organization and advance planning it can simply be another day in your life. The next chapter in which you can make new memories and enjoy new experiences.

How will you deal with your next move? Will you do anything different from what you did last time? What would that be?

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© 2013 Moreen Torpy We would be honored for you to reprint this article. If you do, please include the resource box below with the hyperlinks intact. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Moreen Torpy is the De-Clutter Coach, a Trained Professional Organizer, Author, and Speaker. Her new book is Going Forward: Downsizing, Moving and Settling In. See http://www.GoForwardDownsize.com for more about the book including where to purchase it, and http://www.decluttercoach.ca to learn about her organizing services and other books.

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P.S. To purchase Going Forward: Downsizing, Moving and Settling In, visit one of the quality booksellers here: http://www.goforwarddownsize.com/about-the-book/buy-the-book/

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Reflections of a Move

P7040047-300x225_optDon’t let anyone convince you otherwise, Moving is not fun.  For those of you who are about to experience a “move, ” it is undeniably a stressful process. I have proof.  Today, I share with you excerpts from my diary of my personal move three years ago.

FYI, as a Professional Organizer, the task was no less arduous. I don’t just talk the talk, I actually walked the walk.  I know my perspective will resonate with so many who have survived Moving Day and my lessons learned will surely be helpful. To read more entries, go to Home page and click About and click on Diary of a Move.

 

Day 30: (July 5, 2010) All this planning and organizing, and anticipating…Moving Day was finally here!  Two trucks, six men, and my family, all ready to start the marathon.  I was directing traffic at first, but within minutes, the men were dispersed all around the house, and all you could hear was the cacophony of shrink wrapping, boxes being assembled, and shouting commands from the head supervisor.  I thought I was in control, lol.

Things were happening so fast, I was amazed how quickly the men were prepping the furniture, dismantling my piano, building boxes in record speed, and loading the truck.  It was quite impressive, yet upsetting to see an entire home deconstruct. Watching my huge armoires and dressers come down the steps required all six men, and frankly, I needed to look away.  It seemed that everything that I had boxed and carefully labeled were being randomly loaded onto the truck, based upon the moving men’s organization of the interior of the truck .  Apparently, they had an agenda and it clearly wasn’t in sync with my plan.  I was getting increasingly anxious about the potential disorder of locating and unpacking my boxes.

When the trucks were finally loaded, off we went, and although I was feeling stressed, I was eager to get to the other side to begin organizing.

When the trucks were unloading, I was losing the control I thought I could maintain.  The wardrobe boxes were monopolizing the garage and the smaller boxes were getting lost in the mix.  The moving men’s goal was to deliver, unpack only things they wrapped, re-assemble the furniture and be done. My dot system was only working if I happen to be at the truck when they were unloading it.  I thought about posting signs over the doors of the rooms with the name and colored dots, but was beginning to realize the men just wanted to get the boxes off the truck and out-of-the-way, and move in the big pieces of furniture. Unfortunately, I was so busy surveying the rooms and trying to track my boxes, and as soon as I turned my head, boxes were being dropped off in the wrong rooms.

The boxes were coming off the truck so rapidly, it was difficult to make quick decisions. I ended up using the lowest level for most of the smaller boxes to be dealt with later. I was getting overwhelmed watching all the boxes that I had packed during a passage of time, all invading my space at the same time! The unloading on this end was hard to manage.  Everyone was asking me where everything went because, I knew.  I was in charge.  I planned and organized it all, but it was impossible to micro-manage it. When several lampshades were carried in without their corresponding bases, heavy mirrors and artwork arriving quicker than I could direct, I was losing it. I had realized for the very first time that I had to let go of perfection.  Reality had smacked me in the face, there was no such thing as the “perfect” move.

At the end of the day, the move went into overtime and the men were getting cranky.  It was the hottest day of the summer, and obviously with all doors open, it was hot as hell.  It didn’t help that I changed locations of furniture after they had already placed them, but hey…I was allowed to change my mind! Wasn’t it my prerogative? Don’t get me wrong, the moving company did a stellar job, but all moves are hectic and challenging.

When we eventually shut the doors in our new house, we were beyond exhausted.  Our legs felt like lead, and it was an effort to talk. The only thing I needed to do was make my bed.  I had moved my toiletries and personal items earlier, so it was awesome that I could easily access what I needed for first night’s sleep. The bed was what I needed.  Slept like a baby.

 Weeks later…

(July 23, 2010) After all is said and done, I’m now on the other side of the move, and feeling pretty settled.  To be quite honest, I am shockingly comfortable.  It is astounding to me that after, what seems to be a lifetime in one home, a new one can supersede the memory.  Surrounded by all my stuff, despite a new backdrop, it still feels like my home.  The stuff that mattered I took with me and the treasured memories of my home, I carry in my heart forever.

I realize now that the house was just a shell, and although my footprints were deeply rooted while I lived there, when we moved… so did our souls.  Now in my new home, everywhere I look, it’s familiar and in some cases, it’s even more cozy.  I am loving seeing and appreciating my old treasures in new places.  It kind of feels like decorating for the first time, yet I’m just re-circulating the favorites all around the new space.  If you are creative, re-purposing can be fun.  The creative juices are flowing and inspiring me to look at things I’ve had for over 30 years with a keener objective eye.

What a great opportunity to re-organize the things I’ve neglected, chosen to ignore, nor had the time to sort through the years.  Change can be scary, but sometimes it is good.

New chapter.  Time to turn the page.

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Moving? How Much Sentimental Clutter Makes the Sentimental Journey?

I’ve thought about this often.  When I moved last year (33 years of “stuff”), and realized that ALL of my sentimental mementos could not move with me, I painstakingly pondered over what things to keep and what to shed.  Here’s how I made those tough decisions.

First off, whatever doesn’t hurt to let go of…let it go! If it’s just taking up space because you never got around to tossing it? (procrastinating?) Well then, time to purge.

As for the things that are tugging at your heartstrings, well that requires a great deal more of thinking, particularly if your new space is smaller than your existing one and will not be able to accommodate everything you currently own.  So for me, I took a lot of digital photos of things I wanted to remember but didn’t necessarily need to keep. I actually donated my wedding gown because it had yellowed, my daughter thought it was ugly, and looking at it didn’t even rekindle a moment. I had inherited an enormous box of camp letters from my childhood, and naturally had preserved a collection of camp letters from my own children. I wrote a blog about that very special day and indeed was a very teachable moment. https://movethemess.com/?p=122 After a very emotional day, I walked away with one or two very special handwritten letters (an archaic practice these days), that I couldn’t bear to part with from my deceased Dad.

The funny thing was that most of the things I was saving for the “children”, they had no interest in. Go figure. Their sport trophies, random school projects and papers, stuffed animals, cheerleading pom-poms, naked barbie dolls with missing body parts, and  broken ceramic crafts, were apparently more important to me than them, and so they did not make the journey with us.

Across the board, all photos were revered and since they were mostly organized in albums, they were a no-brainer to pack. Even loose photos were coming with us.  I kept some classic board games like LIFE, MONOPOLY, and donated the rest.  The ten framed jigsaw puzzles that once decorated my playroom walls,  now adorn a hallway at a senior care facility.

In the end, moving while a traumatic event, gives you an opportunity to revisit your stuff, your past, and check in with yourself; to see where you’ve been, decide where you’re going, and most of all, what you’ve prioritized to take along with you on the journey.

Remember this.  We will all move somewhere at sometime in our lives.  Good food for thought.  How much sentimental clutter do you have?

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Reflections of the Move

After all is said and done, I’m now on the other side of the move, and feeling pretty settled.  To be quite honest, I am shockingly happy.  It is astounding to me that after, what seems to be a lifetime in one home, can so easily be erased.  Surrounded by all my stuff, despite a new background, still feels like my home.  The stuff that mattered I took with me, the treasured memories of my home, I carry in my heart forever.  I realize now that the house is just a shell , and although my footprints were ever present while I lived there, when we moved….. so did our souls.  Now in my new home, everywhere I look, it’s familiar, and in some cases, it’s even more cozy.  I am loving seeing and appreciating my old treasures in new places.  It kind of feels like decorating for the first time, yet I’m just re-circulating the favorites all around the new space.  The creative juices are flowing and inspiring me to look at things I’ve had for over 30 years with a keener objective eye.  What a great opportunity to re-organize the things I’ve neglected, chosen to ignore, nor had the time to sort through the years.  Change can be scary, but sometimes it is good.

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Fine Tuning and Tweaking After the Move

Day 33:  (July 8)  I’m finding myself changing my mind about how I want the rooms to be organized.  Every time I enter a room, I move something around, and by the end of the day, I’m moving things around again.  There are a few categories of clothing that have visited just about every drawer in my closet. Some food for thought….it’s really important to live in the space for awhile, and understand what things need to be more accessible and deserve the primo real estate of  the closet.  Creating a new order, in a new place, takes a while. 

So while I’m deciding, I’m still thinking…still moving.

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Settling In After the Big Move

Day 31:  (July 6)  Woke up this morning and had no idea where I was! So strange to get acclimated to new surroundings.  Thankful I kept the same familiar sheets and bedding.  This is my new house and there is much to be done to make it my own. 

It kind of feels like a scavenger hunt, locating the boxes and organizing them in the proper rooms. Discovering a lost box feels like finding a valuable piece of gold. I am on overdrive and my obsession to clear the clutter of boxes is relentless.  Set myself a goal for the day, and forcing myself to impose a resting point and continue tomorrow.  It’s impossible to move an entire house and unpack it in a day.  My brain knows this, and my body surely does, but something else drove me to stay up until 3:30 am.

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Moving Day

 
Moving Day

Day 30:(July 5) All this planning and organizing, and anticipating….moving day is finally here!  Two trucks, six men, and my family, all ready to start the marathon.  I was directing traffic at first, but within minutes, the men were dispersed all around the house, and all you could hear was the cacophony of shrink wrapping, boxes being assembled, and shouting commands from the head supervisor.   Things were happening so fast, I was amazed how fast the men were preparing the furniture, dismantling my piano, building boxes in record speed, and loading the truck.  It was quite impressive.  Watching my huge armoire and dressers come down the steps required all six men, and frankly, I needed to look away.  It seemed that everything that I had boxed and labeled were being randomly loaded onto the truck, based upon the moving men’s organization of the interior of the truck .  Apparently, they had an agenda and it clearly wasn’t in sync with my plan.  I was getting increasingly anxious about the potential disorder of locating and unpacking my boxes. 

When the trucks were finally loaded, off we went, and although I was feeling stressed, I was excited about getting to the other side to begin organizing. 

When the trucks were unloading, and as expected, I was losing the control I thought I could maintain.  The wardrobe boxes were taking over the garage and the smaller boxes were getting lost in the mix.  The moving men’s goal was to deliver, unpack only things they wrapped, re-assemble the furniture and be done. My dot system was only working if I happen to be at the truck when they were unloading it.  I thought about posting signs over the doors of the rooms with the name and colored dots, but was beginning to realize the men  just wanted to get the boxes off the truck and out of the way, and move in the big pieces of furniture. Unfortunately, I was so busy surveying the rooms and trying to track my boxes, and as soon as I turned my back, boxes were being dropped off in the wrong rooms. The boxes were coming off the truck so fast, it was difficult to make quick decisions, so I ended up using the lowest level for most of the smaller boxes to be dealt with later.  Fortunately, my new space is a three story townhouse with an elevator, so I can sort at my convenience.  At the end of the day, the move went into overtime and the men were getting cranky.  It was the hottest day of the summer, and obviously with all doors open, it was hot as hell.  It didn’t help that I changed locations of furniture after they had already placed them, but hey…I’m allowed to change my mind!  Don’t get me wrong, the moving company did a stellar job, but all moves are hectic and challenging. 

When we eventually shut the doors in our new house, we were beyond exhausted.  Our legs felt like lead, and it was an effort to talk. The only thing I needed to do was make my bed.  I had moved my toiletries and personal items earlier, so it was amazing to easily access what I needed for bed, and more importantly, the bed is what I needed.  Slept like a baby.

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Order in the House, Please

 

  

Day 29: (July 1) Helpful hands on their way.  My friends are coming over to load up the cars, and begin transferring the kitchen boxes.  With too many cooks in the kitchen, I am anticipating it being a little chaotic. I’d better have a plan of action to control the traffic of the countless incoming boxes.  Being the Project Manager on the job will probably not be the most popular one, but like it or not, the person in control has got to be ME!  To organize this segment of the move, there needs to be one person at the helm, at least a method to all this madness…..HELP!

The electricians and audio guys are here disconnecting all technology components, removing TVs, separating components and remotes, and I’m labelling EVERYTHING!

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Moving Forward…One Step at a Time

Day 28: (June 30)  I have four days to hand carry and transfer anything I choose, prior to the actual moving date.  This gradual move is giving me a little more control and is allowing me to micro-manage my personal items.  While the new place is being cleaned and painted, I’ll use the garage as a loading zone and I will organize the boxes by rooms.  By tomorrow, I hope to get in there and start unloading the kitchen.  I’m making the “kitchen pack” really easy by just throwing the silverware, knives, gadgets, utensils, etc. into Ziplocs and then into shoe boxes.  The dishes are being stacked in boxes, layered with towels, and the beverage glasses are going into those amazing liquor boxes.  I just LOVE those compartmentalized liquor boxes!  They have served multiple purposes during this pack.  I plan on utilizing them for all my cooking oils, vinegars, refrigerated glass jars, perfume bottles, and more importantly, eliminating the need to bubble wrap. 

My friends have volunteered to load up their cars and do continuous loops back and forth from my house to the new place.  This is a local move so it’s not a hassle.  Nothing better than… getting by with a little help from friends.

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